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When Do You Become A Leader?

 

You can download and listen to the mp3 audio here if you prefer

 

How and when do you become a leader?

A great question!

The short answer is that if you have started a business then congratulations my friend, you are NOW a leader!

If you've only been in business for a few days or a week or so, you might think,  "I'm not a leader, how am I going to help my team as I'm still learning myself!"?

The thing is, you become a leader from DAY ONE.

If you bring somebody into your business in the first few days, presumably you've tried a few products and you've watched at least a couple, (I would hope), of the videos by your upline in your business.

So you do know more than somebody who hasn't yet started.

You can help them; be honest with them if you're fairly new yourself but make it your business to get stuck in and learn as much as you can so you can teach them everything you learn.

You only need to be one small step ahead of someone to be a leader.

Education

To get a head start I would definitely recommend every day to read at least one chapter, preferably, a couple of chapters or more if you've got the time of a good book, a good marketing book, or whatever your business is about.

Personal development is important and mindset because whatever business you're in, your mindset is going to determine your success, so you had better grow as a person if you wish to grow your business.

I would also recommend that you learn something every day in your particular business area. If you're already working full-time in your business, you've got more time to learn.

If you've got another job and/or a family, then I realise your time might be extremely limited. However, still aim to spend a minimum of 30 minutes each day on your education.

Be A Sponge

Watch a video, a training and make notes. Then teach it back to your team.

If you haven't already got a team, don't worry, you are gaining all this knowledge and it will help you when you have.

With just 30 minutes of learning every day, think just how much knowledge you'll gain over a week, a month, three months.

Be a sponge, soak up and absorb every bit of knowledge you can.

Start thinking of yourself as a leader right from day one.

The sooner you do this and the more you do this, then the more successful you're going to be!

 

Remember, if you need any help with your planning and marketing, please reach out to me. I have some excellent planning sheets and trainings available.

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7 Ways To A Happier, More Successful Life?

 

You can download and listen to the mp3 audio file here if you prefer

 

What Do You Want Out Of Life?

Hey, Carole Wildman here. I'm a Certified High Performance Coach, and also a Certified Canfield Trainer in the Succes principles.

I'd like to ask you a question, if I may?

Are you feeling truly happy with where you are in your life right now? Or do you feel that there's more out there for you and that you could be achieving so much more?

Do you even know what you want? 

  • Maybe you're searching for your life purpose and you don't quite know what it is or how to get it?
  • Maybe you want advancement in your career and your job or maybe you want a total change and you're not quite sure what?
  • You might want to get healthy and fit but you lack motivation.
  • You might want better relationships.
  • Maybe you want to make a lot of money and you don't know how?
  • Maybe you just want to feel happier than you do right now?

I've felt all of these things at various points in my life and I didn't like feeling like that.

What Is High Performance?

When I was first introduced to high performance, I didn't know what that meant.

It turns out that High Performance can be described as living a life of full engagement,  joy, courage and confidence, and it also means achieving more than you would normally achieve. Not only over a short term but over the long term and consistently.

I've written a short ebook called 'The Seven Life Arenas You Must Master For a Happy, Successful and Fulfilled Life'. If you download this book and learn how to apply these areas which I talk about it's quite possible it could change your life.

Below I'll tell you the first two areas discussed in the short ebook:

Clarity

Why clarity?

Well, if you're not clear about exactly what you want from life (and you may not be), then how on earth can you expect to get it?

To say that you want a new job, more money, bigger house is vague. It's got to be specific. What is your dream job? What does it look like? How much money do you want and in what scale of time? What exactly does your dream house look like and what is the location?

You must know exactly what it is that you want.

In my ebook, I use the analogy of a dartboard as representing and holding your life's goals within.

The bullseye in the center of the dartboard represents your biggest goal.

Your ultimate goal.

The surrounding areas outside the bullseye represent other goals you want to achieve along the way.

Providing you know what these goals are, you've got something to aim for. You can aim for the bullseye or you can aim for the other targets.

Over time with practice, you're going start hitting those targets.

However, if you don't know what you want, if you're not specific or if you've absolutely no idea what it is you want to achieve, what hope have you got of achieving it?

In that scenario, there is no dartboard.

You're throwing your darts against a blank wall and wherever they're hitting is what you're getting.

Very often it's something that we didn't really want and then we're left asking,

"why am I not getting more money," or "why am I not getting what I want out of life?"

It's because you haven't set specific goals. You're not clear on what it is you want out of life.

Clearly, clarity is critical, and in High Performance coaching we dig deeply into this area.

Focus

The second area is focus.

Once you know exactly what it is that you want, and you're throwing your darts and aiming, you've got to focus on a regular basis.

If you think about it, if you're just going practice your darts once a week or once a month, how long is it going to take you to hit those targets? You may never hit them. It's certainly going to take a very, very long time.

If you're practicing daily, you're focusing.

You're not being distracted by everything else in your life such as watching the television, social media, surfing the net.

There are so many distractions that we have in our lives, aren't there?

So if you're not focusing daily on targeting those goals and doing something to move forward to achieve them, (throwing your darts as in my analogy of the dartboard), then you're simply not going to achieve them.

So, clarity and focus clearly are extremely important.

Download the short ebook

So these are the first two of the seven life arenas in my ebook and I know if you download this book, read it and learn to master these areas, your life will change without recognition. 

You can download it below. Just click on the button. It's very short, only 18 pages so won't take you very long to read, yet the messages within are plain, simple, to the point and powerful.

If you would like to reach out to me afterwards then please do. I would love to hear from you.

I'm on social media or you can visit my blog here anytime you like.

If you'd like coaching, I'm here as a Certified High Performance Coach but if you just want the free ebook, that's absolutely fine. Go and download it now and I absolutely know that it can help you if you allow it to.

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Is It Better To be Optimistic Or Pessimistic?

 

You can download and listen to the mp3 audio file here if you prefer

Is It All Hype?

Are you sick of all the hype and everything that you hear about being positive?  Positive thinking, the power of positive thinking, is it all just mumbo jumbo?

Well, if you're a pessimist and you think it is, it's good news for you because studies apparently have found, (and this is according to Tony Robbins), that pessimists are apparently a lot more realistic!

Tests

Tony Robbins is, of course, a great inspirational, motivational coach and life coach and in the video I'm talking about he explains how pessimists are more likely to be right when you give them certain tests. When pessimists are asked how things in general in their life are going right now they're very likely to get it right.

Optimists, on the other hand, are much more likely to overestimate how well they're doing and think they're actually doing better than they are. 

So well done pessimists.

The Bad News

The bad news, however, is that pessimists are actually not very likely to achieve goals and dreams that they otherwise might because they see them as being highly unachievable.

Because they're right about how things are going for them at the moment, they're not likely to even try and achieve certain goals because they think, "Well, obviously, that's not possible. I'm not even going to attempt it because I know I'm going to fail," and that's exactly what happens.

Optimism wins 

Optimists, on the other hand, because they believe they're actually doing better than they are,  keep going, and if things don't go too well for them, they remain optimistic. They think, "Well, I'm doing okay though," and they just keep plugging at it, and they keep going.

They keep being optimistic, and they keep showing up day after day. They're a lot more likely to actually achieve their goals and dreams and so it is good news, in the end, for optimists.

But pessimists, yeah, you're definitely more realistic, and you know where you are at the moment and you're right.

Food for thought.

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Consistency Is The Key

 

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Are You Consistent?

Are you consistent in most things, in your life, in your business, and  in your life in general?

If not, are you wondering why you're not achieving the success you so desire?

Consistency really IS the key to success. Whether you're trying to lose weight, build your business, strengthen a relationship; whatever it is, consistency is the key.

If you can learn just this one thing in life, then it is probably one of THE most important things you'll ever learn.

This may sound a little dramatic but it's actually true, for it's the little things that you do, day after day after day that shape your life, your business, everything.

 

The Slight Edge

I've been reading a book recently called 'The Slight Edge', by Jeff Olson and I highly recommend it. He talks about the power of doing consistent things, day after day, and how much it can change your life by producing a compound effect, and adding momentum to your life, and to your business.

If you hit the snooze button in the morning when the alarm goes off when really you intended to jump out of bed and do some work then you're making a choice.

If you decide to eat that piece of cake, when you're really trying to lose weight, then that, is again a choice. If you keep doing this day after day, and wondering why your life isn't changing, then you have your answer.

 

It's In The Choices

It's in these small, seemingly insignificant everyday choices that our success is determined, (or lack of success). As Jeff explains in his book, there really is no such thing as an overnight success.

It may appear as though some people have become successful overnight but they actually haven't. What appears to have been a success overnight, is actually the culmination of many, many months and maybe many, many years of small consistent efforts every single day that have accumulated and accumulated until suddenly the scales tip. 

Voila! ... Success YES!... Overnight, NO

 

Losing Weight

It's like trying to lose weight in a week. Yes, it may be possible to lose 10 pounds in a week, but that's not really a success.

The success is if you've still kept it off a year, two years, five years, 10 years later. If you lose 10 pounds in one week and then you go back to making the wrong choices again day after day, the weight is simply going to come back on.

So your success is actually a one week success and then back to failure.

So, the importance of the little everyday decisions that we make can impact and do impact on the whole of our lives.

I do highly recommend this book by the way.  It's called, 'The Slight Edge', by Jeff Olson. Absolutely brilliant, easy to read, makes total sense and it could just change your life.

If you need any help with your planning and marketing, please reach out to me. I have some excellent planning sheets and trainings available.

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Are You Preparing To Fail?

 

You can download the mp3 audio file here if you prefer

Why Prepare to Fail?

This may seem a strange question because obviously none of us are going to prepare to fail on purpose.

However, by not preparing ourselves, there's a saying isn't there?

"fail to prepare, prepare to fail".

If we have big dreams and goals and we're not preparing ourselves to achieve them, then we are preparing to fail.

Whatever your dreams and goals are, whether they're small or large, you need to break them down into bite-size chunks and you also must know what you need to do every step of the way in order to eventually achieve that goal.

If it's a five year one, you need to break it down firstly into years, and then into months. Then you need to break it down into weeks and ultimately into days.

Failing Quickly

We all want to move forward quickly yet this is a mistake a lot of people make as they soon run out of steam and ultimately motivation.

In preparing your day by knowing exactly what you're going to do to take steps towards achieving your goal, you know you're moving forward.

If, however you fail to plan, then a week will go by before you know where you are. A month may go by.

Then you're going to be feeling a bit down and thinking to yourself, "I'm not getting anywhere, I'm not moving towards that goal".

Plan of Action

  • Decide what you want and how long you think you will need to achieve this goal
  • Break it down into monthly plans and steps
  • Once a week on the same day write down a plan of action of what you're going to do each day of that week
  • Have three must-do things, things you must absolutely get done each day and then write some other things down that you also intend to do. Hopefully you'll get some of those done as well, but if you don't then at least you will do those three things.
  • If you don't do this every week, then please before you go to bed at night, write down the three things you must do the next day.

If your time's limited because you've got another job, maybe you've got a family to take care of and other responsibilities and your time is obviously a lot more constricted if you're not full-time yet in your business, then this is even more important.

Be Organised

Being organized is critical and in knowing exactly what it is that you're doing.

You'll feel better about yourself by doing this because you will know that you are taking those forward steps. Even if it's just slowly. You are slowly moving towards achieving those goals.

If you need any help with your planning and marketing, please reach out to me. I have some excellent planning sheets and trainings available.

Follow me on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram and keep in touch.

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Should You Invest In Yourself?

 

Should You Be Investing In Yourself?

You can listen to the mp3 audio here if you prefer.

The quick answer to this question is yes, you most certainly should be investing in yourself and I'll tell you why.

If you're in any sort of business, whether you're just starting out or whether you're trying to get it off the ground, if you have the mindset that you're not going to spend any money and you're going do it all on the cheap, and you just don't want to invest in yourself, then I'm sorry to tell you but you're not going to be successful.

 

Consistent Growth

Whatever business, whatever niche you're in, you need to be learning constantly. You can invest in books for a good starting point as this doesn't need to cost you a lot of money.

Personal development books are good whatever niche you're in, and if you're in internet marketing, I know some great books I can recommend for you.

You probably need to be getting courses, certain ones, but, choose wisely, as you can't buy everything yet you do need to learn.

Follow Successful People

If you want to be successful, then follow the people who are successful and learn from them, and it will give you a shortcut to success.

It will also save you a lot of trial and error. Of course, there are a ton of courses out there and some are better than others.  I can recommend some good ones for you as well if you wish.

If you ask any six, seven, or eight figure earner how they became successful, they will tell you they've invested multiple thousands of dollars or pounds in their success and in working on themselves.

Why Coaching?

The reason why they invest is that they know how important it is to keep learning, to keep improving themselves. The most successful will also tell you that have invested in coaching. Even though you might think, well they don't need coaching now they're so successful, most will tell you that they still do invest in coaching from coaches who they know can take them to exactly where they want to be!

Types of Coaching

Personal one on one coaching is absolutely fantastic and is possibly the shortest cut to success. Of course personal coaching can be extremely expensive especially if you're going straight to a top earner for private coaching.

Again, there are ways to shortcut this as well. I'm happy to tell you from my experience what I have found and the resources which have been the best for me. So click on the link below and it will take you to a page where I'll tell you exactly what I recommend in books, in courses, and in coaching. 

If you need any help with your planning and marketing, please reach out to me. I have some excellent planning sheets and trainings available.

Follow me on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram and keep in touch.

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What Is A Successful Life?

 

 

If you would like you can listen to the mp3 audio recording here 

Defining Success

If we were to look in various dictionaries we can see there are several definitions of the word 'success', - yet it is one of those words which is incredibly difficult to actually define.

Success quite simply cannot be defined as it means different things to different people.

Traditionally one is seen to be successful if one has achieved a certain ‘status’; be it financial or fame based, however we all know that many rich and famous people have turned out to be very unhappy – some have even taken their own lives.

Could this mean, therefore,  happiness, contentment, and satisfaction play a part in the definition of success?

After all, how can someone be living a successful life if they are unhappy inside?

Success, quite simply, is defined by each of us as an individual.

NB. If you need more happiness in your life and/or suffer from negative beliefs then  jump straight here.

Broadly speaking I would say that to most people a successful life would contain one or more of the following concepts and words;

  • Being happy
  • Feeling fulfilled
  • Having purpose
  • Achieving goals
  • Free from financial burden
  • Being healthy and fit
  • Giving and receiving of love
  • Family

For me, it means all of the above and for most people, I think it will be a combination of them.

Achieving Goals

In order to feel fulfilled it is important that we are achieving some sort of goals - whether they be personal or professional or a combination of both.

Quite simply if we are not growing we are dying and to grow as a person we need to attain certain 'achievements' or 'goals' along the way. These can be very small things - in fact, sometimes it's the smallest successes which bring the most pleasure and feelings of satisfaction. It could be a child learning how to write his first word; for instance... can you remember how proud you felt when you achieved this feat?


A Sense Of Purpose

At certain stages of our lives, most people find themselves 'taking stock' as it were, and asking themselves deep questions such as, "what do I REALLY want out of my life", or "What is the purpose of my life?".  Certainly, as a coach, this is a question I hear quite frequently, and it has become quite apparent that a sense of purpose is vital for us as human beings.

What happens if we are not feeling happy or successful with our lives? What can we do to turn things around? Can we help ourselves?... The good news is that yes we can!

3 Places To Start

Here are just 3 things we can do to set us on the path of change, although there are very many more also.

  1.  Make a list of the things you are grateful for having in your life. Yes, I know you've probably heard this before - but DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE the power of gratitude. Write down at least 30 things you already have in your life for which you are grateful. It can be as simple as 'having a roof over my head' and 'having food to eat'. As you do this really FEEL grateful as you write. Almost invariably you will feel better having done this simple exercise.
  2.  Raise Your energy!  Diet and exercise play a huge part in this. It is scientifically proven that exercise lifts our mood. Whilst this can mean going to the gym several times per week it doesn't have to mean that.  There are simple exercises you can do at home, for instance, take up yoga or pilates, go for a walk or a swim. Just move your body!
  3.  Write a list of 100 things you want to achieve in your life...  Are you clear about what you really want out of life? If you are not then this can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and sometimes unhappiness or in some cases even depression. Most people won't take the time to do this as they 'haven't got time', or they 'can't be bothered', yet is an incredibly powerful thing to do. The first few things you write may be materialistic stuff, but as you reach the 20th, 30th, 40th thing you start to go deeper... to uncover what is REALLY important to you.

These are just a few of the very many things you can do to increase your happiness and set you on the road to feeling successful.

If you would like more strategies please feel free to reach out to me or if you are suffering from negative beliefs this can definitely help.

For more information about coaching please read on:

Because success can and does mean so many different things to different people, a Success Coach or a High Performance Coach sees everyone as the individual which they are, and offers the tools and strategies to enable profound changes to be made when a client participates fully and openly.

 Success Coaches do not need direct expertise in any particular area in which a client may work or play. They can work equally with Fortune 50 CEO’s, Olympic athletes, a painter and decorator or a mum of 6.

 They do not offer advice to their clients, but rather hold the client as creative, resourceful and whole.

You already hold the answers within you – which the coach uncovers and enables by use of skillful questions, challenges, and support. A great coaching program will also provide the client with proven tools, structure and strategies which in themselves can be life changing when used diligently and consistently.

If you would like a FREE 60 minute session with me, a Success Coach, then please apply here.

Yes, it is necessary to complete a questionnaire for me before we can schedule a session; this is necessary as my time is valuable as is yours.

There would be no point in us scheduling a conversation if I do not feel I can add value to you during the free session and beyond, should we choose to continue. 

I look forward to hearing from you should you choose to apply, and if not I hope I can continue to add value for you with my blog updates so please feel free to sign up here.

If you would like FREE mini trainings for your marketing go here

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It's Never Too Late to Make New Choices

 

 If you would like you can listen to the mp3 audio recording here 

Making Choices

Is it Ever Too Late To Make New Choices?

Have you ever looked back to a time in your life and wished you had done something differently, or you wish you'd made a different choice?

I'm sure you have - I know I certainly have.

Our whole lives are made up of a series of choices; we make them each minute, each hour, day, week, month and so on, and our lives are shaped by these choices.

It's so easy to look back and wonder what might have happened if we had done things differently; maybe our lives would have been better, and maybe they wouldn't?

The thing is that no matter what choices we have made in the past they cannot be undone, and it is only in the NOW that our future can be shaped, and that is decided by the choices that we make NOW in the present moment.

Sometimes people need help; if someone is in a really bad situation - maybe they need therapy or counselling for some trauma, then they can make a decision now to get the help needed.

If the situation is not as serious as that but you know you have a decision to make that will improve your life then it is your choice to make that decision.

Why We Don't Make Decisions

Maybe you are struggling with your health and you know you need to get fitter or eat more healthily; maybe a relationship is desperately in need of improving - or even leaving, maybe you desperately want to change your job, career, or improve your business?

  • Sometimes we don't make an empowering decision because of a lack of courage
  • sometimes it is a lack of clarity - we don't know exactly what it is that we want
  • sometimes it is a matter of productivity levels, - we are just not doing what we know we need to do or we lack direction.

Most people do not make empowering decisions because they become paralysed by FEAR, and they allow this to stop them from following their dreams, desires, and goals.

Many people die never having chased their dreams. They don't realise that they are powerful creators, and that we are here to live the best life we possibly can, and not to hide ourselves away in a bubble of fear.

What is the worst thing that could happen if we follow our dream?

What is the BEST thing that can happen?

How will you feel if in 10 years time or 20 years you are still in the same situation simply because you lacked the clarity, the courage or the direction to take action; to make a decision which could change the shape of your future?

I urge you, my friends - don't let fear stop you!

* If you would like to work with a Certified High Performance Coach I am offering a free 60 minute strategy session which can help you uncover what may holding you back. During our session together I will also give you some high-performance strategies you can put into place immediately.
Spaces are limited so apply here for your session now.
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Self Beliefs - Changing The Paradigm

Overcome Negative Self-beliefs Now

If you prefer you can listen to the mp3 here.

The Power Of Our Beliefs

If I were to ask you what are some of the beliefs that you hold about yourself,  I wonder how many you could come up with? Even more to the point, how many of these beliefs which you hold about yourself do you actually KNOW to be true?

"Change your thoughts, Change your beliefs, Change your life".

Apart from beliefs which have been indoctrinated within us since childhood due to our family’s religion or culture or whatever, - most beliefs we hold as adults are simply thoughts which we tell ourselves over and over again - until they become so deeply rooted within us that we believe them to be true. 

But just because we tell ourselves something over and over each day are those thoughts and ultimately beliefs always true?  And are they kind and loving ones?

 What kind of things do we say to ourselves out of the 50 – 70,000 thoughts we all have each day? Are they empowering thoughts? – Well, interestingly, it seems not. Apparently on average a whopping 70% of these 50 – 70,000 thoughts we have each day are actually negative ones.

 That’s a pretty scary thought, isn't it?.

Everything Is Connected

There’s been much discussion about which comes first, our feeling and emotions or our thoughts, but what IS true is that they are both very strongly connected, so it stands to reason therefore that the things we think about and tell ourselves on a daily basis are actually pretty powerful things.

Have a think for just a moment about some of your beliefs you hold about yourself? You know you are ‘good’ at some things for instance, but you probably believe that you are not ‘good’ at others. You may believe that you are unattractive because you are overweight or have a blemish on your skin.

Yet these things are simply not true.

None of us has a perfect figure or body,  yet we know that what one person loves or finds attractive about someone, another person doesn’t.

If you think you’re ‘not good’ at something again it’s often (not always I know), but often its something that we either haven’t even tried or something that we ‘could’ become good at if we really wanted to. We may have been told by someone else that we are not good at something and so we ‘learn’ this belief about ourselves – yet it may not be true.

So, If a belief is simply a thought we tell ourselves over and over again until we believe it to be true, it stands to reason therefore that with practice over time we can also ‘unlearn’ these negative beliefs and begin to change them if we know they are not serving us.

Un-Learning Negative Beliefs

There are simple techniques we can use, many of which only take up a few minutes of our busy day, yet by applying them they have the power to change our lives.

Because the negative thoughts and beliefs we hold about ourselves can often lead to worry, anxiety, and self-condemnation, these can have an impact on our whole lives; our relationships, careers, and most importantly our own self-esteem.

9 Proven Techniques

There are  9 quick, proven techniques for learning how to change the paradigm and live a more empowered life with empowering beliefs which I’d love to show you. Doing these simple things can ultimately bring more joy and self-love into your life, and they have the power to change your relationships, your career and your whole life for the better.

If you think you don’t really need this I guarantee if you put just 3 of these techniques into practice in your daily life you will see positive changes.

 You can pick and choose which things resonate with you the most and which will fit into your lifestyle the best.

"Change your thoughts, Change your beliefs, Change your life".

 

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What Is Happiness and How Do We Achieve It?

 

You can listen to this episode and download its mp3 from my podcast for free here

 

3 Types Of Happiness

In his course 'The Happiness Project', Robert Holden talks about the 3 types of happiness.

  • 1. The first type he describes is pleasure, which is a sensory feeling of happiness.

Examples of this are many.

What do we find pleasurable? This will of course differ for everyone but generally certain types of food or drink are 'pleasurable', certain smells or sights, experiences, music. The list is endless.


We all like pleasure!


The only downside to pleasure is that it is dependant upon a stimulus and a response; there is a limited timescale, - when the stimulus is gone the pleasure soon dissipates.
There is an opposite to pleasure also which is pain.

 

  • 2. The second type of happiness Robert describes is satisfaction, which is circumstantial.

This type of happiness is based on desire, and getting what you want.


There is always a 'because' or an 'if' or a 'when' attached to it.
For example, I'll be happy 'when' I get my new house, job, lover etc.
I'm happy 'because' my favourite team beat their opponents yesterday, or 'because' I just passed my exams.
I'll be happy 'if' I get an A grade, or 'if' I land that job.


This second type of happiness is fragile.


Research shows that circumstantial happiness is short term, and has only a negligible effect on our overall long term happiness.
There is an opposite to this type of happiness also, which is dissatisfaction.

 

  • 3. The third type of happiness is joy, also described as 'an unreasonable happiness.'

It's 'unreasonable' because there is no apparent reason for it that we can see or touch.
Joy is something which comes from within us.
We 'tune into' it - it is always there for the taking, yet we have to choose it.

Have you ever suddenly felt really joyful for no apparent reason?


The feeling just 'wells up inside of you' and you're not sure where it came from?
This is the type of happiness that comes from joy, and there is no opposite to this.

Watch a young child playing. Young children and babies experience joy naturally - it's in their very being. They don't need a reason to feel joyful - they just ARE.
They are happy to be alive - there's no hidden agenda. They find wonder in the smallest thing.

Later they LEARN to want things more and more, and for their apparent happiness to depend on pleasurable experiences and circumstances.
We teach them that by role modelling it and it's not our fault
- it's how we were taught also.

 

Choosing Joy


Joy is always there inside of us but we have to tap in or tune in to it.

We've forgotten how because we got caught up in the endless cycle of searching for our happiness outside of ourselves and we can never find it there.

 

"The very nature of joy makes nonsense of our common distinction between having and wanting". C. S. Lewis

This is not to say we give up having goals and dreams.
We don't need to give up pleasurable moments and feelings of satisfaction.

 

On the contrary - we can and should enjoy every pleasurable experience and live our lives to the full.

As long as we don't make our overall happiness in life dependant upon these transient moments and we realise that true happiness is the 'unreasonable' happiness of joy that can be found within ourselves 'at any given time', then our search for happiness will finally be over.

Sounds easy but of course it takes practice and we shall forget over and over that this is really possible. Especially as most of us have had many years of 'programming' to think that happiness depends on external things. The freedom that it brings, however, when we can do this is priceless.

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